Is Civility Dead?

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bamavet55

bamavet55

Member
Feb 17, 2022
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Alabama, United States
Before I joined this forum, as required, I read the forum rules. Of those rules, rule number 1 stands out to me: "...The diversity of opinion and intelligent civil discourse is encouraged; by the same token: rude, lewd, vulgar, obscene, flaming, baiting, trolling, hateful, threatening, insulting, violent, or slanderous content will not be tolerated...".
I have agreed to abide by the forum rules, as I understand that without rules chaos is inevitable.
Being human, I am far from perfect. If ever you find my comments offensive or uncivil, feel free to point that out to me.
A recent thread I initiated provoked a few emotional and intense responses:https://www.airgunnation.com/threads/the-most-off-putting-ad-in-the-classifieds.1268961/
Rest assured, in all matters, I endeavor to treat others as I wish to be treated.
Thanks for listening [sic]
Al
 
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To answer your literal question, civility was never alive. It's always a carefully crafted fabrication. The illusion of its "life" depends on it continuously being created, i.e. it has no staying power.

In my experience, on-line forums tend to stay positive, polite and productive pretty-much in direct proportion to things being always "on-topic". The more "meta" threads are allowed to get, the more chaos that ensues. You want a bit of "meta" in a forum, to let people relax and discuss small-potatoes and lingering issues, but generally it's best not to let them go very far because this kind of thing happens.
 
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madeintheuk said:
I would advise if you don’t like the comments that were made in your thread, that maybe you don’t start a thread attacking another member, whether you though it was in good taste or not!
If this is an Apology for that thread, it’s a bad one!
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Trust me sir, this was not intended as any apology. I stated my opinion and I stand by it. I will speak up wherever I see gratuitous cruelty and incivility.
I don't need, nor will I entertain your advice.
 
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delooper said:
To answer your literal question, civility was never alive. It's always a carefully crafted fabrication. The illusion of its "life" depends on it continuously being created, i.e. it has no staying power.

In my experience, on-line forums tend to stay positive, polite and productive pretty-much in direct proportion to things being always "on-topic". The more "meta" threads are allowed to get, the more chaos that ensues. You want a bit of "meta" in a forum, to let people relax and discuss small-potatoes and lingering issues, but generally it's best not to let them go very far because this kind of thing happens.
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For some of us, maybe: "...civility was never alive...".
I try to practice good manners, as best I can. However, I will not countenance bad treatment. One can only be expected to "turn the other cheek" so many times.
 
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bamavet55 said:
". One can only be expected to "turn the other cheek" so many times."
Did you see the post?:
I try to practice good manners, as best I can. However, I will not countenance bad treatment. One can only be expected to "turn the other cheek" so many times.
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Two quotes for you, both from the same author.

In regards to the post that you started......
“A desire not to butt into other people's business is at least eighty percent of all human wisdom.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

And in regards to this current post......
“A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.”
― Robert A. Heinlein
My take is that people came at you because they thought you were calling out the poster of that ad, (un-necessarily, at least for the types that ascribe to the mentality in the first quote). So I guess we've got a case of "you reap what you sow" here.
 
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Franklink said:
Two quotes for you, both from the same author.

In regards to the post that you started......
“A desire not to butt into other people's business is at least eighty percent of all human wisdom.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

And in regards to this current post......
“A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.”
― Robert A. Heinlein
My take is that people came at you because they thought you were calling out the poster of that ad, (un-necessarily, at least for the types that ascribe to the mentality in the first quote). So I guess we've got a case of "you reap what you sow" here.
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Sir, a heart felt question for you: What do you do when you see what you believe to be a wrong being committed? Robert Heinlein notwithstanding.
 
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What wrong was committed? The guy didn't want to deal with anybody lowballing him. For all we know he still has that balance on the credit card he originally used to pay for the gun and quite literally HAS TO get that minimum amount back to pay off his debt. We simply don't know his situation. As was pointed out already, for a potential buyer, if you don't want to pay that amount for the package then don't contact the guy.

Yes he was pretty blunt, but sometimes that's the only way to get a point across, at least to some people.

From my perspective, you trying to incite the mob against the seller is just as offensive as his bluntness.

All of that goes back to the first quote I shared. If you aren't the seller or a potential buyer, it's none of our business.
 
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Franklink said:
What wrong was committed? The guy didn't want to deal with anybody lowballing him. For all we know he still has that balance on the credit card he originally used to pay for the gun and quite literally HAS TO get that minimum amount back to pay off his debt. We simply don't know his situation. As was pointed out already, for a potential buyer, if you don't want to pay that amount for the package then don't contact the guy.

Yes he was pretty blunt, but sometimes that's the only way to get a point across, at least to some people.

From my perspective, you trying to incite the mob against the seller is just as offensive as his bluntness.

All of that goes back to the first quote I shared. If you aren't the seller or a potential buyer, it's none of our business.
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I think you missed my question, so I will repeat: "What do you do when you see what you believe to be a wrong being committed? Robert Heinlein notwithstanding."
 
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bamavet55 said:
As to your assessment: "So I guess we've got a case of you reap what you sow' here."
After these 67 years of life as a member of a minority group member and all that entails, I assure you, comments on a forum from anonymous respondents -- that I disagree with -- are quite trivial to me. Trust me on that one.
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Trivial enough for you to have now started two different posts about it.
 
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Franklink said:
you missed my point, there was no wrong committed
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Au contraire!
I get your point. I also get that you refuse to address my question.
Not to mention how you've mischaracterized my intention with my initial post (i.e. "...inciting the mob..").
Just as you, the seller and other members of this forum are entitled to your opinions, so am I.
Another mistake you make in your response to me ("If you aren't the seller or a potential buyer, it's none of our business."). I consider myself a potential buyer, being a member of this forum.
 
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bamavet55 said:
.......
Another mistake you make in your response to me ("If you aren't the seller or a potential buyer, it's none of our business."). I consider myself a potential buyer, being a member of this forum.
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So take it up with the seller, unless you don't want to pay more than his minimum listed price, in that case, leave it alone.
 
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